The "Celebrity" Hall of Shame: Joe the (Unlicensed) Plumber

Even Madonna is impressed by the speed and chutzpah of your self-reinvention, Joe the (unlicensed) Plumber. Sorry, I mean Joe the (talentless) Country Singer.

I can't keep up. Because last I heard, you wanted to run for Congress... Oh wait, maybe that was before you announced your plans to host your own talk show (on Fox News, I'm sure). Whatever.

See, “Joe” now has "representation", as they say in The Biz--what "celebrity" doesn't, right? All those interview requests, and media appearances, not to mention career planning... you've got to have someone managing your bright bright career--just ask Paris Hilton, with whom you, Joe, have much in common (except for, you know, the great hair).

Under this "representation," Joe is now courting a record deal with a major label because... well, Joe's a longtime country music fan, you see, and he “knocks around on guitar” according to his reps. “He’s a complicated guy with a very dynamic personality,” say his reps. “He can sing and obviously has a strong political point of view.” Obviously.

So much for your "dreams" of having your own plumbing business (if only that mean little Socialist, Obama, would just get out your way). But hey, why earn a decent American living if you can just fast-track your way into being a "Celebrity" instead.

So to all you aspiring musicians out there: maybe you should "play out" less and just hang at campaign rallies instead. Look how far it got Joe...

Don't Call 911 If You're Stuck in Traffic

Amazing. I used to work in Show Biz, so I've had encounters with the children or relatives of Stars who love to ride on those sparkly and famous coattails. The line usually goes something like: Do you know who my father/brother/son is?

It seems even the brothers of Presidential candidates are not above such behavior. Allegedly.

A man named Joe McCain (and John has a brother named Joe) called 911 to complain about the 15 minute traffic jam he had to endure. Here's a transcript of that call:

Operator: 911 state your emergency
Caller: It's not an emergency but do you know why on one side at the damn drawbridge of 95 traffic is stopped for 15 minutes and yet traffic's coming the other way?
Operator: Sir, are you calling 911 to complain about traffic?
(Pause)
Caller: "(Expletive) you." (caller hangs up)

So. The 911 operator called him back, presumably to inform him that 911 was for actual emergencies--you know, of the life-threatening variety. But the caller's voicemail picked up instead:

"Hi this is Joe McCain I can't take this message now because I'm involved in a very (inaudible) important political project... I hope on Nov. 4th we have elected John."

Think it ended there? Nope. The angry Joe McCain called 911. Again!

Caller: Somebody gave me this riot act about the violation of police.
Operator: Did you just call 911 in reference to this?
Caller: Yeah.
Operator: 911 is to be used for emergencies only, not just because you're sitting in traffic.

See why I rail at politicians who act like "celebrities?" If they act like celebrities, then their friends & family start acting like celebrities, and so on and so on...

To date, the McCain campaign has refused to comment.

Hear it (see it) for yourself here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Y6_s3O5Bj0